Big brouhaha over New Dorp boy’s tiny toy gun

STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. — A 9-year-old New Dorp boy earlier today learned there is no wiggle room in the Department of Education’s “no toy gun” policy — even if the toy gun is just two inches long.

Patrick Timoney, a fourth-grader at PS 52, South Beach, was nearly suspended after playing with LEGOs during his lunch period because one of the action figures was carrying at toy machine gun.

He and his friends had planned a playdate with their respective toys, and were sitting around the cafeteria table when the principal walked in and saw the action figure carrying the fake gun.

While the action figure was a standard LEGO policeman figure, the brand of the gun could not be determined.

The brand of the gun could not be determined? Um, it’s not a gun.

It’s not even one of those life-sized replicas. It is one of those tiny things for Lego action figures. Similar to this:

The principal told the parents that she considered the little piece of plastic suspension-worthy, but a call to a security administrator resulted in only the little piece of plastic being confiscated and given to the boy’s parents.

A message left for Principal Evelyn Matroianni was not returned. However, Margie Feinberg, a spokeswoman for the DOE, said there is a no-tolerance policy when it comes to fake guns because they are considered harmful to the school community.

If someone put this in a movie about public schools it would be dismissed as a fiction. (Hat tip to the reader who sent this in.)

UPDATE: Comment on the NY Firearms board about the uncertainty over the brand of gun:

What about the year of manufacture, lots of potential laws broken here, hard to tell from the pic, but if that thing is not pre-ban, the student is looking at some felonies for sure.

Hilarious.

Over at the Firearm Blog:

“Buy a gun,” a member of a recently busted inner-city gang told The Buffalo News last week when asked what could be done to curtail homicides. “Hey, I’m just being honest. You asked.”

Buffalo police say that they don’t agree. Surprise surprise.

The Buffalo News disabled comments on the story.

And failed:

A Times Square bloodbath was narrowly avoided because the machine-pistol-toting thug who fired at a cop flipped the gun on its side like a character out of a rap video, causing the weapon to jam after two shots, law-enforcement sources said yesterday.

When scam artist Raymond “Ready” Martinez held the MAC-10-style gun parallel to the ground, it caused the ejecting shells to “stovepipe,” or get caught vertically in the chamber, the sources said.

Ha ha. What a jackass. Via Rummel.

Staten Island Girl Pulled Into Woods In Attempted Abduction; Neighbor Heard Screams, Saved Victim

A Staten Island man came to the rescue of a teenaged girl, just as she was being abducted. But this Good Samaritan says he would have done the same for anybody in need.

“I’m not a hero, I did what I had to do,” Patrick Klatt said. “The girl needed help and I was there. I was lucky I heard her.”

Evil is done because good men stand by and do nothing. But not always.

Burress pleads guilty on felony charge

Facing the prospect of spending at least 3½ years behind bars, one-time Super Bowl star Plaxico Burress on Thursday accepted a plea bargain with a two-year prison sentence for accidentally shooting himself in the thigh at a Manhattan nightclub.

The former New York Giants wide receiver pleaded guilty to one count of attempted criminal possession of a weapon, a lesser charge than he had faced. He will be sentenced Sept. 22, and lawyer Benjamin Brafman said he expects Burress to begin serving his sentence immediately after.

If he’s well-behaved, he’ll likely serve 20 months.

Even if he decided to break the law and ignore common sense to carry it in, all he would have needed was a half-decent holster to avoid all this.

Here’s some slanted coverage of an event in New York:
2 suspects dead, 2 injured after 72-year-old opens fire in New York City

Sounds pretty sensational, no? Here’s the first few paragraphs of the AP story:

The sidewalk outside the Harlem store still was smeared with blood Friday, and the glass on the door still was blown out.

Above the entrance, someone had scribbled the words, “Abandon hope all ye who enter here.”

Less than 24 hours after a deadly showdown at the shop worthy of a Clint Eastwood script, Charles “Gus” Augusto Jr. entered his store — oblivious of the inscription taken from Dante’s “Inferno.”

Sounds simply brutal.

Four guys walked into a commercial restaurant equipment wholesaler and demanded “the money.” When there was no money, they pistol-whipped an employee and waved the gun at a cashier. When he sensed that the robbers were preparing to shoot, he pulled a 12-gauge and let them have it.

Here’s more neighborhood silliness:

Reactions to the shooting were mixed.

Frida Rodriguez called it “a sad day” for the neighborhood.

Augusto “was defending his work, his business, so you could perceive that as being heroic,” she said. “But on the other hand, these kids died.”

Uh, Frida, there is no “but.” He was defending his work and his business. No “but.”

If the bad guys had pistol-whipped everyone and gotten away clean with a few bucks, there would have been little or no new coverage. Little or no hand-wringing over “a sad day.” Little or no “mixed reaction.” Criminals pull this shit all the time every day.

Then suddenly someone defends himself and it’s a cause for worry.

Replica rifle has Brooklyn man at odds with cops

Michael Littlejohn is under fire from the NYPD over a replica Revolution-era flintlock rifle:

Littlejohn fired the first shot when he hired a Tennessee blacksmith to recreate the vintage rifle. It arrived at his Sheepshead Bay, Brooklyn, apartment in June – followed quickly by city cops.

Police claim it’s illegal for Littlejohn to keep the flintlock without a gun license.

Littlejohn, 50, cites the earliest American patriots as his inspiration while refusing to surrender his firearm or apply for a license.

The social worker is also clinging to a little-known exemption in the city’s strict gun laws.

The loophole allows license-free ownership of “antique firearms” – defined as rifles that require the bullet and gunpowder to be loaded separately.

The way it’s described here, anyway, it sure sounds like he can legally own and possess this rifle without a license.

What Murdoc finds even weirder is how the cops found out about the rifle:

The NYPD learned about Littlejohn’s $825 rifle when he left a receipt inside a Staples copy center, prompting a call to the cops.

Find a random receipt for a gun and call the cops on it?

Cash-strapped states raid 911 funds

More than $200 million collected from cell phone users for upgrades to the 911 system has been diverted in the last two years to plug state budget holes, keep campaign promises and, in at least one case, buy police uniforms, an Associated Press analysis has found.

Never, ever rely only on the authorities to keep you safe or help you when you need it. Especially if anyone in power has campaign promises to keep.

Oregon, Arizona, Delaware, Hawaii, Wisconsin and Tennessee are among the states that have dipped into their 911 money recently. New York and Rhode Island have been diverting their funds for at least five years. States started collecting the funds in the 1990s.

In the fiscal year that ended in June 2008, Rhode Island collected $19.4 million in 911 fees and used $5.8 million for 911. The rest went to the state’s general fund.

If only politicians would make campaign promises to upgrade the 911 system, they could raid the 911 upgrade funds to keep their promise to upgrade the 911 system.

South Orangtown Middle School:

A school administrator wrestled a gun-toting former NYPD cop to the ground Tuesday after the crazed dad barged into a Rockland County school, furious his son got the swine flu, cops said…

Gun drawn, [Peter] Cocker strolled into the school past a security guard’s station about 11:30 a.m. The unarmed security agent called cops and in minutes, a SWAT team and several police units converged outside.

When the officer got to Mitchell’s office, they found the door had been barricaded and heard the sounds of a “violent struggle,” police said.

The officers blasted through the door with a shotgun.

By that point, Mitchell, 55, had already gained the upper hand.

This guy was obviously deranged, the superintendent acted heroically, and the story has a happy ending.

But if this idiot had gone in with the intent to kill large numbers of people, it appears that that unarmed security guard and the SWAT team would have been too late. Which is the way it will almost always be.

Jeff Soyer notes NY Congressman Eric Massa (D-Corning) speaking to high schoolers:

After a question about gun control, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a copy of the U.S. Constitution.

“This is the owners’ manual for Congress,” he said, flipping to the section containing the amendments and reading the second amendment, the one that establishes the right to have a militia and to bear arms.

“I will not, have not and won’t vote for any new gun control regulations,” he said. “We have not begun to enforce the laws we have.”